Nuts and bolts.

Carefully worded…

I’ve had this weakness of keeping things about other people, which bother me, to myself and being angry with them. And they usually didn’t know why I was mad, poor things. It had been a long time since anybody actually got me upset. Recently, one of them, who claims to be bestfriends with me, did, and after much coaxing to let her know what the matter was, I sent her this carefully worded text…
“Since you ask, here goes. I am perfectly fine, but I don’t really like the way it sometimes feels like you don’t even have time for even sending a small text or anything. I know you’re very very busy. Meeting is a totally different thing, out of question. And every call need not always have to be a long one. 5 mins you can spare, no? It might just be in my head, but I felt so and tried to keep a distance. When I was away, you used to say things like I miss you and stuff right? Well, in my opinion, it was just words. I’m sorry for being so blunt. You did have time to meet other people, didn’t you? When you say “I’ll always be there for you”, you should actually be willing to listen and make time. I tried telling this to you before too. Next time you say something, please make sure you mean it. I wish this weren’t over a text, but whatever. I tried looking at it from your perspective also. Let me know if I overlooked anything. Get well soon, btw. Sorry for telling you this now.”
I had meant every word I said. It did feel good after letting out all out. But ironically, I haven’t gotten a reply yet. Been a couple of days already. Plus, I found out she really is meeting other people, other than me. Well, maybe there was a network error. Maybe she was so sick, she didn’t know she received a message. Maybe a dear friend of hers deleted it, so that she didn’t see it and get even more ill. Maybe her phone was eaten up by a zombie. Or maybe she just didn’t have the courage to face the me she always asked for… No one can say. I wasn’t too harsh, was I? Please tell me I wasn’t…